Elections already?

Humph's friends to the south are in the midst of election season, so he is pleased to share a favorite tale about those with tails to mark the occasion. It's based on a story told by Tommy Douglas - legendary Canadian politician and grandfather of 24 actor Kiefer Sutherland.

Humphland was a place where all the little white dogs like Humphrey, Marbles[1], Bijoux, Chakra and Bija lived and played, were born and died, and lived pretty much like you and I do. They even had a Parliament. And every four years they had an election. They used to walk to the polls and cast their ballots. Some of them even got a ride to the polls, because everyone knows how much dogs love their rides. And every time on election day, all the little white dogs used to go to the ballot box and they used to elect a government. A government made up of Big Fat Black Cats. Those cats were big – much larger than the little white dogs!

Now if you think it's strange that the little white dogs would elect a government made up of cats, just look at North American political history, and maybe you'll see that they weren't any stupider than we are. Now I'm not saying anything against the cats. They were nice fellows, they conducted the government with dignity. They passed good laws…that is laws that were good for cats. But the laws that were good for cats weren't especially good for little white dogs. One of the laws said that the doggie-doors on dogs’ houses had to be big enough for the cats to enter. Another law said that little white dogs had to travel at certain speeds, so cats could catch up with them without too much physical effort. All the laws were good laws for cats. But they were hard on the little white dogs, and life was getting harder and harder.

When the little white dogs couldn't take it anymore, they decided that something had to be done about it. So they went en masse to the polls. They voted the Black cats out, and put in the White cats.

The White cats had put up a terrific campaign. All that Humphland needed was more vision! They said, "The trouble with Humphland is all those round doggie-doors. If you put us in, we'll give you square doggie-doors!" And they did. But the problem was that the square doors were twice as large as the round ones, so now several cats could get into the dogs’ houses at once and eat all the dogs’ food. The Big Fat White Cats boasted about how they used binders full of puppies to solve problems of dog under-representation in government! For the dogs’ own good, they mandated invasive dog ultrasound tests!

And life was tougher than ever. When the little white dogs couldn't take that anymore, they voted the White cats out and put the Black ones in again. Then they went back to the White cats, and back to the Black cats, they even tried half Black cats and half White cats. They called it a coalition. They even got one government made up of cats with spots on them. These were cats who tried to bark like the dogs, but they still behaved like cats.

The trouble wasn't the colour of the cats, but the fact that they were cats. And since they were cats, they naturally looked after the cats, instead of little white dogs. Along came a little white dog named Harpo. Harpo had an idea!

Tommy Douglas reminds us to watch out for a little fellow with an idea.

Harpo went to the other dogs and said, "My friends, why do we keep on electing a government made up of cats, why don't we elect a government made up of little white dogs?"

"Oh!" said the little white dogs, "He's a Bolshevik!" So they put him in Jail.

You can lock up a dog or a man, but you cannot lock up an idea!

---

[1] Marbles, of course, has a colorful coat. But close enough.

Zelig's look-a-like

Willowdale Dog Zelig, a very gentle sheltie, enjoys a disguise now and then - especially when it's a chance to look like a brooding Hollywood actor.

 

 Of course, Zelig is practically unrecognizable when he's not incognito!

 

 

 

Ricky, the black lab who recently visited Willowdale, found Zelig's glasses hilarious.



"Zelig, you are a card!"

 

"Yes, Ricky, he ought to be dealt with."

 

 

 



Binders full of puppies

When a recent candidate for canine political office discussed his experience in acquiring "binders full of puppies," Humphrey got to thinking. What was he talking about? And, what could possibly be in those binders?

A recent study published in the scholarly journal PLOS found that looking at images of cute animals made people more careful and focused in their work! Humphrey is also fascinated by the (unrelated) research of Dr. Irene Blair of the University of Colorado suggesting that exposure to counter-stereotypes can reduce certain kinds of bias and discrimination.

So, if someone were to combine these findings, is there something that can be done in the workplace to help with productivity and equity simultaneously? Humphrey thinks so! Here is his idea that involves cute animals *and* gender-atypical achievement...

If viewed by workers at their desks, this photograph of Marie Curie holding baby Humphrey will:
(a) Increase productivity?
(b) Decrease gender and species bias?
(c) All of the above?

Humphrey hopes to make a binder full of images like this some day.

Smells like...Pushkin?

It was a dismal, rainy afternoon so Humphrey took it upon himself to puruse the Holt Renfrew fall catalogue in his continued study of consumerism.

Being of the canine persuasion, of course anything olfactory in nature is of particular interest to him. He noticed that perfumier Arquiste, was featured. "A new scent!" Humphrey exclaimed!

And not just any scent! It was called Aleksandr to tell the story of the last day of Russian literary figure Aleksandr Pushkin’s life. At first, Humphrey wondered if this was a real product - but indeed it was!

Drawing of Pushkin

Humphrey was fascinated. Arquiste, it turns out, is curated by an architect who specializes in historical preservation, so their scents attempt to conjure the experience of a specific time and place. Just the kind of thing a dog like Humphrey gets excited about!

Aleksandr features "notes of neroli, violet leaf, fir balsam, Russian leather, and ambrette" to re-create Pushkin's last day of life, before he was mortally wounded in an 1837 duel . The neroli and violet are to evoke Pushkin's morning toilette, the leather to refer to his gloves and boots, and the fir balsam to evoke the winter landscape in St. Petersburg.

If only Humprhey could make his way to Holt's to sample this scent!

How would Aleksandr be different from Humphy's typical olfactory experience? It might start with top notes of chocolate and coconut, like the morning coffee brewing; middle notes of fresh-cut grass and perhaps Russian olive to reflect his time outside. Then perhaps a mellow base of vanilla and honey that evoke his afternoon - and evening siestas. Too bad there's no particular scent to conjure the joy of squeaking a plush duck. But probably only Arquiste could get it quite right.

Machines for Thinking

In his book, Practical Judgements, Mark Kingwell discusses the concept of furniture as machines for thinking, observing very few people of letters seem to discuss such things. "How these rooms are furnished, what pieces inhabit them and give them shape, determines in large measure what kinds of thoughts are possible there," he writes. "The rooms of our existence are throbbing with thoughts waiting to happen, with insights struggling into the ever-changing light."

Humphrey especially enjoys climbing up to the top of any piece of furniture for the purpose of thinking.

Exploring perspectives atop many chairs, chesterfields, and beds, Humprhey has been giving thought to Kingwell's thesis. Humphrey's colleague Harpo recently asked him, "How do you go about writing?"

"Well, Harpo," he said, pausing. As a prelude to his own writing, Humphrey routinely selects a purposeful spot - usually on his favorite, fluffy bed - to contemplate, collect and organize his thoughts. Sometimes, he closes his eyes, allowing his mind to be lulled into a relaxed and creative state. "I guess I start with a good stretch, and then I lie down on my silk bed under the desk, and let my thoughts pool and swirl."

When operating machines for thinking, Humphrey sometimes resembles a polar bear.

Yes, Humphrey finally concluded privately, Kingwell is right! All these pieces of furniture, these are machines for thinking! Some machines are for dreamy, creative thoughts; others are machines that energize and alter him. That bed is indeed his machine for a certain kind of thinking.

Wondering about how others make use of machines for thinking, Humphrey asked his guardian about the matter. She had a few ideas of her own.

A modern chair is the perfect machine for modern ideas. This one is clear and ethereal, just right for postmodern work!

Old machines like this chair and footstool can be modernized for thinking, but remind us of a certain charm of days gone by.

A luxurious sofa is the best machine for leisurely thought, especially when one wants to free-associate.

And finally, like Humphrey, she agreed that a bed is perhaps the best machine for thinking of all, one which the body is so comfortable that it allows for entirely unencumbered contemplation.

Humphrey remembers Kingwell's words: "Stop now, and listen. Listen hard. Listen for the sound of machines for thinking whispering their thoughts to you. They whisper of love and death and honour lost. They sing of good meals and funny friends and art that moves you. They welcome your achievements and ease your pain. They support you when you can no longer support yourself."

August is a time for feasting...

About a week ago, Humphrey was gently lured out of his afternoon siesta slumber state by a familiar scent.

He rushed downstairs to see what was going on. "Is it Christmas? Seems awfully warm for a feast like this!" he asked the poeple. Nobody answered, but there were all sorts of very interesting sounds just outisde the patio door. Humphrey made his way to the patio and behold....



...a very full barbeque awaited his inspecction!!

Before long, a very special meal was served to mark the end of summer and his return to Willowdale.

 

 

It was a wonderful end to his summer holiday, and he can't wait to return for his next southwestern Ontario feast. 

Lazy Summer Days

Humphrey apologizes for the absense of posts this summer. It's been a time of relaxation.

Here's how summer has shaped up for him so far..

Most days, Humphrey prefers to get up at precisely 10:30 AM. Something about those Yves Delorme clover sheets make it almost tragic to have to leave the bed. But then again, summer days offer many different adventures...

Once fully awake, all kinds of great things are in store for Humphrey. When the weather is sunny, he looks forward to his swim (and initiating then supervising the process of chlorinating the pool). This, of course, is followed by the process of drying out his coat under the big apple tree.

By 2PM, he's ready for his afternoon siesta. Swimming and pool maintenance can be exhausting!

Rejuvinated, afternoons are time to work on choreography projects featuring his favorite squeakies(when his knee doesn't prevent it)...

Before long, it's supper time! Nothing beats a barbeque with goodies from Ted Farron's...

Or even better, a trip to Arcata for some of that famous Windsor take-out pizza!

...followed by a trip to Dari de Lite for retro, drive-in style soft ice cream!

An evening walk ends the day, and before you know it, it's time for sleep.

All this activity makes keeping up with blogging nearly impossible. But he promises to catch up soon!